In honour of breastfeeding week, I would like to document my breastfeeding experience because it's really no mean feat. So, from the beginning I've always thought I should breastfeed exclusively for the first 6 months as according to WHO recommendations (and since I'm a healthcare professional, I always try to follow evidence-based guidelines lol). But since Ella was admitted for phototherapy the 3rd day of life, which was when my milk kicked in, I was worried she wasn't stimulating my milk supply (and also I gave up on exclusive breastmilk for her because she was given formula during her admission, and I couldn't produce enough at that time since my milk just kicked in). The feeling of milk kicking in is super uncomfortable, I think that's what mastitis really feels like because the boobs go rock hard and super engorged; I kept pumping with tears streaming down my face because it was so painful (and me who never shed a tear during delivery, this tells you how painful engorgement can feel like) and prayed that I will NEVER get to experience mastitis (which meant I would not purposely stimulate myself to have an oversupply). The first 2 months were tough; she fed nearly every hour, at one point she was cluster feeding every evening that I just gave up on counting down the time towards bedtime, I just passed my time watching drama whilst feeding her (and surprisingly I did finish one drama during her 2nd month lol). Night feedings were okay for me because I think I'm naturally a night owl, so waking up at night once or twice were bearable. But I missed napping in the daytime and if she didn't nap, I'd get really tired. So, in the first 3 months, as Ella had a very good latch, I was direct feeding her from the breast most of the time and have no idea how much I really produced.
Hence, when I started work, I was thinking of supplementing with formula (at that time I had exclusively breastfed her for 2 months, I stopped formula after the 1st month as it seemed I had enough supply). Then, it turned out she may have allergy to cow milk protein, which meant no formula unless it was extensively hydrolyzed. But although I have to sacrifice not having dairy at all, in a way it was good for her as it forced me to really exclusively breastfeed her and it turned out, my supply is just enough for her. She's turning 6 months soon; which means that I have exclusively breastfed her for at least 4 months already, and I didn't think I would persevere till now. Pumping takes a lot of time and washing up pump parts is my least favourite thing to do. But luckily she still likes to latch so I only pump during the daytime when I have to work and latch her afterwards during the evening, nights and weekends. I'm glad I get to breastfeed because I think its due to this that I lost my pregnancy weight so fast (I'm now at my pre-pregnant weight, and even my gynae said I looked like I never got pregnant during my 6 week checkup hahaha), and Ella always stops crying pretty quickly whenever I offer her the boob (that is if she cries due to boredom or no other reason like hunger or wet diaper).
In short, breastfeeding is really tough with no support but luckily my hubby has been a great support. Older people still believe in formula and at first I was quite stressed about this but I didn't want to stress myself too much so I supplemented whenever it seemed like she was still hungry as fed is best. But since Ella herself likes to breastfeed, I think she's still the greatest support before hubby that spur me to breastfeed through milk blebs and aerola abrasion (both quite painful, not kidding, I shed so many tears the first month due to this).
Here's to hoping that I can continue breastfeeding her as long as she wants or needs it!
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